Gloria & Terence

Gloria & Terence's Story:

I met my husband in 1999 when I was 17. I had an ectopic pregnancy and lost my right tube at 10 weeks at 20 years old. We decided to relocate to Atlanta Ga where we got pregnant again and it was ectopic but we were able to save my tube. We got married five years later. Right after our one year anniversary our world was turned upside down. My husband was diagnosed with leukemia and we were told he wasn’t going to live. Well, we beat cancer! By 2008 he was cancer free but not without complications. We were told we would never have kids so we adopted our niece then our great nephew and went on thinking no one can help us because in our black community no one talks about ivf, like it is a bad thing. My mom passed and before she did all she kept asking us for was a grand baby. We talked about ivf and did our research and had plenty of consultants. I was told I was to fat, my husband was to sick, so why try it if it would never happen? But we wanted to try. They were willing to take our money so we started the process. I got a job at Starbucks, then Amazon and did more research because they both covered ivf. It seemed more out of reach so I had a lot of testing done and procedures done and one day I was on Facebook on 2017 and CNY popped up on my timeline. I said oh no this is to good to be true or is someone playing a trick on me? I prayed about it for a while then I spoke to my husband and he was so excited and he said 'let’s do it, I always wanted to go to New York let’s do it!' My first ever consultation was horrible. I had come to far to give up now, so my consultation this time was with Dr. Kiltz. He made me feel like this could really happen. He was so caring in person so I knew I would be in good hands. Being that my husband is a cancer survivor, he had to do a pesa. Nurse Donna got that schedule for him and man I tell you they made us feel like family and not a patient. Unfortunately, we lost our rainbow at 7w5d. We tried again with a FET that didn’t work, so we tried again and it didn’t work. We then did another egg retrieval and a fresh 3 day transfer. It worked but was ectopic with twins. We tried again with FET and it didn’t work again. At this point my body was tired, my heart was aching, and I was done. But my husband asked me while on a month long vacation to please try again. I remember asking him 'Why? It’s not gonna work. I’m tired of the hurt and pain.' But he kept asking me until finally I said 'one more time and I’m done.' A month later we went back for an egg retrieval after talking to Dr. Kiltz and coming up with a new plan. We got 8 eggs this time. Dr. Corley did my egg retrieval and bless his heart, he’s so sweet. I found hope the next day when I got a call saying my eggs looked great and 7 fertilized. I said 'Great, let’s do a fresh transfer.' I came in that morning to do my HCG wash and Intralipids. Dr. Kiltz came in to talk to us and I asked if I could do a day 2, fresh transfer since day 3 was a Sunday and they don’t transfer on Sunday's. He said, 'Why not? If you have faith what can it hurt?' We did a day 2 fresh with 2 embryos and now we have our Son who’s going on 7 months! I would like to thank our CNY family for helping me fill the hole in my heart that I didn't know was there until I had my son on November 8th 2019 at 33w3d. Now I talk about ivf a lot and try to help anybody I can to fill there dreams of being a parent.

Being a person of color effected me...

Ivf is like a secret world in the black community. It’s unspoken. I think people would suffer in silence then talk about ivf

Helpful resources Gloria & Terence found:

Journaling definitely document everything and a great support system I have 2 wonderful groups on Facebook that have helped me get thru this process also my husband helped a lot even when my hormones was all over the place

Unique Moments:

A low for be was my low beta and thinking I was gonna have a miscarriage at any time but a high for me was hearing his heartbeat for the first time also seeing him for the first time but the best was hearing him cry when he was born

Hope, Inspiration and Advice:

This is a hard road protect your peace think positive and it will happen maybe not the first time maybe not the fifth time but it will right when you need it the most