Stephannie & Ian

Stephannie & Ian's Story:

Our story started after only a few dates. We were in college (March 2012), and I had just turned 21 (a day before) when I was rushed to the emergency room from lacrosse practice. Long story short, I had a 6cm x 4cm mass on my right ovary that was blocking my small intestine, causing severe infection. I was diagnosed with PID (Pelvic Inflammatory Disease, derived from the Mirena IUD, which has a <1% chance of this happening, happened.) and had to sign off on exploratory surgery, which could result in a hysterectomy. I was absolutely beside myself - I thought "who would keep dating someone who has no chance so early to have children". It was an extremely emotional and trying day. Thankfully, I only lost one tube and the mass was removed in that surgery, but the scarring was severe and I was told when the time came to trying to conceive, we could face many issues, including ectopic pregnancy. My now husband, then not even boyfriend, was there for me. He visited in the hospital, helped with my recovery and our relationship blossomed from there.

Fast forward 8 years later, we were married and decided to try right away. We knew with only one tube, and the scarring, things may take a while. I was scared; I didn't want to go through any more surgeries or bad news. Well, we got pregnant the first month we were trying. It was Valentine's Day and we were so excited for our first appointment. We went in for bloodwork, all was good. I begged for an ultrasound with my history and high chance of ectopics, and although it took some begging, we got one. My husband was not able to be there, so it was just me. I heard the heartbeat before we saw the baby, because it was in my tube. I was told the terrible news, alone, that we would have to go to surgery right now and that I would be losing my tube, and my fertility. I was inconsolable as I called my husband at work. We sat together, as we were told the next steps; go to the hospital, they will be waiting for you; your fertility will be gone and IVF will be your only option, no there is no way to save anything; yes you heard the heartbeat, but it is not viable. Those words still ring in my head years later. The darkness that came over me and the following months was something you cannot be prepared for. The surgery was successful, and for the second time, my husband helped me recover. This time, I was more emotionally scarred and the hormone changes were significant. The loss was more than I thought I could handle. But, we kept going and discussed what we wanted to do to build our family.

I dove into research. I knew our only choice was IVF. So, I started researching clinics, costs, medication, steps to do before your first appointment, anything I could research, I did. It gave me hope. I am originally from Rochester NY and finding CNY Fertility, I couldn't believe it. I had a hard time as we were unfamiliar with infertility and did not have many resources to turn to for advice. I created a Facebook and joined IVF support groups, and then groups specific to CNY. I made our consult, for July 11th 2018. It was 6 months down the road. We were excited, nervous, unsure of what to expect and of course, scared. I was scared it wouldn't work, that I would fail us once again. The thing no one seems to talk about is how you can be excited but also down right terrified that it isn't going to work. My husband never faltered. He was supportive, encouraging and ever the optimist. Exactly my opposite, and exactly what I needed to keep my head up.

Our consult went great and we were able to start with our next cycle. We did genetic testing, more tests on us just to be sure there wasn't anything else that could affect us before August. We started injections for the egg retrieval in August and had a successful retrieval, and decided to try a fresh transfer. It resulted in our now 1 year old son. We have frozen embryos, which we will be going back for another transfer in a year or two. Without CNY, we would not have been able to afford IVF, let alone have our son. We are beyond grateful and I cannot even begin to sing enough praise for the doctors and staff, who walked us through everything. It was so foreign and new to us; injections, suppositories, follicular ultrasounds, everything the process included was overwhelming. But CNY made sure we were always knowledgeable and comfortable with our next steps. Our miracle son is because of them, and we cannot thank you enough. No amount of words can express our gratitude through this challenging process and the comfort the staff at CNY instilled in us. Thank you, with every fiber of our beings.

Favorite Team Member at CNY:

We did all of our consults / monitoring at the buffalo location. I drive 2 hours one way each time to be at the Buffalo location, and I will do it all again, no doubt in my mind. Kris was incredible. Her entire staff always made us feel welcome and knowledgeable, but Kris was incredible. Always answering our questions and never making us feel rushed or dumb for asking our questions. We recommend her to anyone.

Helpful resources Stephannie & Ian found:

We used IVF support groups through social media and found those helpful. Also, Dr. Kiltz live feeds were always helpful. As someone who was new to everything, anything I could get my hands on to give me more information was helpful. I did not do anything extra other than talk with others. Talking seemed to help me the most.

Unique Moments:

The highs were absolutely hands down when our retrieval was successful and then the overall experience through CNY. My husband could not be there for the transfer, but I felt safe and excited none the less, thanks to Dr. Corley.

After our egg retrieval, Dr. Kiltz sat and talked with my husband and I for about an hour. We were amazed at the care we received and how we never felt rushed. Our overall experience was one we will never forget. Even if our first transfer was not successful, we would have had a great experience regardless.

Our story is different because we had a known problem, which I know seems to be a blessing. It is, and I am thankful for the answers we have. But, the heartache we felt through getting to the known answers was tough. It was something we really weren't prepared for (can anyone be?) and it really helped us to come together so early in our relationship and then again in our marriage. Knowing at barley 21 years old that you may struggle to have children made me very intimidated to even try, knowing the physical and emotional pain I felt from the first surgery.

Hope, Inspiration and Advice:

I hope that others who feel lost at the sudden loss of their fertility know there is still hope. It can work, and can be achievable when insurance does not cover it. I was lost, felt like I was just going through the motions of life because I felt like the one thing I should have been able to do, I couldn't. The idea of IVF made me hopeful again. My hope is that others who find themselves in similar circumstances can find hope. Hope that their treatment can be successful and that they will have their miracle babies.